My first permanent job was in a grocery store, stocking shelves and working receiving. I often worked 6 days a week, leaving Sundays as my one day of rest. Each Sunday found me grouchy and anti-social. Sometimes, I tried to relieve the grouchiness by doing something social. It never worked. Over the three years I had that job, I learned that I needed a day of grouchy, anti-socialness as my day of rest each week.
Now, Fridays are my writing days. It gives me something to look forward to each week as I divide the rest of the week into health appointments, paid work, and symptom management. But as I start my writing day with my next Long COVID Chronicles piece on this Friday, my body is telling me I have earned my day of rest.
This week, I exceeded my three appointment cap on health stuff with a total of six appointments: three for Long COVID, two for my foot, and one for post-surgery recovery. I also had a work meeting and spent several hours researching zoning amendments from the 1920s. Today, I am tired and overwhelmed as I try to process all of that activity, including the good news that my foot injury is a stress reaction and not a fracture.
I tend to get bogged down in the feelings of the moment. Feeling physical tired and mentally sluggish is frustrating especially as in the moment it seems like I feel that way all the time. However, partly because I am writing this down, I can see that this is actually a huge win.
Five weeks ago, I felt overwhelmed with four health appointments (3 virtual and 1 in-person). This week, my six appointments comprised 3 virtual, 2 in-person, and 1 in-person physical therapy. After all that, while I am physically and mentally tired, I am not completely incapacitated. That is amazing.
It goes against my training to feel happy when I feel this tired, but maybe I can be slightly less grouchy as I transition my writing day into a day of rest.
Feature image credit: rest by Hayashi Fumihiro from Noun Project (CC BY 3.0)
Carolyn Ristau 