Walking, skipping, and dancing are fundamental activities that make my soul sing. When I sold my car earlier this year, it was a relief as I felt like I was returning to my natural state.
Skipping and dancing have not been possible this year with my Long COVID, except for one of my random, extremely high energy days when I turned on a BollyX dance workout video and danced along at my current capacity.
Most days, I am able to walk. Sometimes I only have energy to walk around the block. Sometimes I have enough energy to walk a mile. While only a fraction of my normal 2-5 mile walks, these smaller walks are still soothing to my soul.
These walks are probably a key reason why I’ve been able to emotionally handle Long COVID as well as I have. A threat to my ability to walk is a major threat to my emotional health, which is a major threat to the severity of my Long COVID symptoms.
Unfortunately, in August, I developed foot pain that is consistent with a stress fracture (I’ve had at least two of these before). After my abdominal surgery in October, I saw my orthopedic who said I should wear a boot as it is possible I have a stress fracture, and based on his physical exam it hasn’t healed in the 2+ months since I started noticing symptoms.
My mood plummeted after that appointment. Walking in a boot is extremely difficult, especially with limited core strength due to chronic fatigue and abdominal surgery. I can manage short distances when necessary, but I can’t take a soul-sustaining walk.
This new perspective helps explain why my previous stress fractures were so much more depressing than Long COVID despite having a shorter and more definitive recovery time. I’m hopeful that my MRI in early December will give us a more definitive diagnosis. If it does turn out that I have a stress fracture, hopefully, I will be out of the boot before too long.
I want to regain the momentum I had post-surgery. For at least a week after surgery, I felt like a person without Long COVID. Even though some symptoms returned in the following weeks, I still had more energy and more capacity than I have had all year. That all vanished with my orthopedic visit….a visit I nearly cancelled because I was feeling so good. My fingers are crossed that I will be able to return to a similar state once I’m on the other side of this latest foot injury.
Feature image credit: Dancing by Lars Meiertoberens from Noun Project (CC BY 3.0)
Carolyn Ristau 
2 thoughts on “Movement for the Soul”