Several months ago, I asked my Long COVID clinic specialist a poorly articulated question about the moment of recovery from Long COVID. I think I packed too much into a single question including how do we know when I am recovered from Long COVID, is there an actual moment of recovery, when I’ve recovered will I return to just as I was before getting sick, and will there be some permanent impact from this experience. The part that I did not try to ask is given how new Long COVID is and how much is unknown are these questions actually answerable.
Her answer was not exactly what I was trying to ask, but it did give me comfort and insight into the experience of Long COVID. The expectation is that I will return to a base state of health like I had before getting sick, in other words, return to my version of normal health.
Since this conversation, I have experienced some significant relapses but I have also experienced some significant improvements. But among all these ups and downs, I am beginning to feel in my core what one of my therapists said a few months ago, “our bodies always strive for health.”
Beginning Memorial Day, I have experienced several moments where it was as though my body flipped on the normal switch in certain areas. I remember the first three vividly because it was such an unexpected experience and because they happened overnight on Memorial Day.
Sleep – This was the first, and most noticeable, switch to normal. After months of having an extended night’s sleep (maybe 9-10 hours), my body suddenly declared it was ready to return to my normal 7 hour sleep cycle.
Walking – On the walks I took in the days after Memorial Day, my body was suddenly moving at my normal fluid pace.
Hair – At the same time these other changes happened, my hair had suddenly returned to its normal thickness.
The normal switch hasn’t remained consistently on. For example, it turns out that my body still needs additional sleep and so I need an afternoon nap to support my regular 7-hour overnight sleep, and even then there are several nights a week where I sleep longer. Some days I walk my normal pace; some days my body moves much more slowly. And, recently, I noticed my hair has gone back to being thinner.
Based on this experience, I now expect the return to my normal to be as bumpy as the overall healing journey has been. Over time, I imagine more aspects of my health will see a normal switch turned on. These switches will flicker on and off for some time, but eventually, all the switches will turn to normal and stay there, I hope.
Feature image credit: switch by Mega YellowLedbetter from Noun Project (CC BY 3.0)
Carolyn Ristau 
2 thoughts on “The Normal Switch”